12 October 2014

Not My Father's Son by Alan Cumming

Summary from Goodreads:
In his unique and engaging voice, the acclaimed actor of stage and screen shares the emotional story of his complicated relationship with his father and the deeply buried family secrets that shaped his life and career

A beloved star of stage, television, and film, Alan Cumming is a successful artist whose diversity and fearlessness is unparalleled. His success masks a painful childhood growing up under the heavy rule of an emotionally and physically abusive father—a relationship that tormented him long into adulthood.

When television producers in the UK approached him to appear on a popular celebrity genealogy show in 2010, Alan enthusiastically agreed. He hoped the show would solve a family mystery involving his maternal grandfather, a celebrated WWII hero who disappeared in the Far East. But as the truth of his family ancestors revealed itself, Alan learned far more than he bargained for about himself, his past, and his own father.

With ribald humor, wit, and incredible insight, Alan seamlessly moves back and forth in time, integrating stories from his childhood in Scotland and his experiences today as a film, television, and theater star. At times suspenseful, deeply moving, and wickedly funny, Not My Father’s Son will make readers laugh even as it breaks their hearts.

I first noticed Alan Cumming as an actor in the movie Circle of Friends (he plays the skeevy clerk who bamboozles Minnie Driver's mother into thinking he's helping the family business).  He then popped up as the manager in Josie and the Pussycats, among other things, and right now he can be found performing on Broadway in Cabaret and introducing Masterpiece Mystery in his delightful Scots accent.  I knew little about his personal life - not surprising since he's not one of those A-listers being stalked by the papparazzi - but after reading the promotional copy (which was similar to the summary above) I knew this was a memoir I should read.

At minimum, Not My Father's Son is a well-structured and well-written memoir about the crazy summer that Alan Cumming spent shooting an episode of the British geneaology series "Who Do You Think You Are?" - learning about his maternal grandfather and undergoing severe emotional upheaval from his abusive father. Cumming has a great writing style (he does not appear to have a co-writer) and while many parts of the book, particularly episodes from this childhood, are upsetting and sad, he doesn't let the reader dwell or wallow in the past. There's a fantastic digression about the insanity that is the Eurovision Song Contest and another digression about his hair since he had just started appearing regularly on The Good Wife and was during this time period going au naturel with his natural salt-and-pepper color. And another short digression centered on the BS women put up with in clothing, nails, and hair removal (he was shooting part of a miniseries at the same time as all the "Who Do You Think You Are?" stuff where he played a transvestite).  The story of Cumming's journey into his family's past was so compelling.  Well done.

(And he calls his mother Mary Darling - because Darling is her maiden name and she's also a darling. It makes her seem like a distant relation of the children from Peter Pan. Isn't that sweet?)

Dear FTC: I received access a digital review copy of this book from the publisher via Edelweiss.

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