The World's Greatest Love Letters (mini-review)

The World's Greatest Love Letters edited by Michael Kelahan was a little(-ish) book I snagged in the bargain bin for Valentine's Day.

It was a quick read.  Only the letters are arranged by subject, which seems really subjective, with no biographical information about the writers or recipients.  Which made the reading difficult (and I consider myself decently well-informed regarding British historical figures but Wikipedia only does so much).  It also seemed really narrow focus - hetero British exchanges.

The McSweeney's Joke Book of Book Jokes (mini-review)

It took me several years and at least two Dewey's Readathons to get through this book.

It was funny in places.  It tried too hard in places.  It was kind of awful in places.

The only story I liked was the Winnie-the-Pooh one and it was at the beginning.

(And the book opens the wrong way - I understand this is part of the joke but I find it annoying on my shelf.)

StrengthsFinder 2.0

So, the managers at my store are reading this.

And I was like, haha!, I will read this too and see what you are up to.

Yeah, this isn't that kind of book.

I've taken Myers-Briggs Personality-type tests before (I'm an ISTJ) so the evaluation tool you take at the Gallup site is pretty similar. And worth the purchase of the book because that gives you the code to take the test to find your top five strengths (check in the back of the book to make sure no one's stolen the code before you buy it). The majority of the book is the description of the 34 strengths and action goals - which are all available at the StrengthsFinder2.0 site which is a bit repetitive.

My strengths are:
1. Input
2. Learner
3. Consistency
4. Intellection
5. Responsibility

Pretty spot on. But what about the next five or ten strengths? And how do these interact with one another?

Oh, snap. You have to pay for a coaching session (about $550) to get the 6-34 list.

So I read the other 29 strengths and found ten that resonated with me so it's safe to assume they rank as the 6-15 crowd. But there's nothing in the assessment spit out by the website or anywhere in the book about how your strengths interact with one another. No "If you've got these two strong strengths be careful you don't come across as a severe hardass" or "Manage your time so people don't think you're a lazybones" type material.

So I'm not sure what this will get the managers. Because I don't see how this will improve one manager's ability to slack off, take extra breaks, and "pretend" to work when we all know she's dickering around calling her grown children. Or another manager's propensity to treat the booksellers like dirt because of his own issues.

Maybe they'll have to read Strengths-Based Leadership by Tom Rath to figure that out.

Fitzwilliam Darcy, Rock Star: in which I start dabbling in Austen-derived fiction

So, Sourcebooks had a "Jane Austen's birthday" sale (which I posted about) and I decided to try on JA inspired fiction/fan-fiction/modernizations for size.  Which I lump together as "Austenesque" books for lack of a better term.

I had heard bits and bobs about Fitzwilliam Darcy, Rock Star in the blogosphere so I decided to try this version of rich-nineteenth-century-gentleman-translated-as-rock-star first (and, for the record, I'm just going to assume that everyone has read Pride and Prejudice so none of the actual plot points are spoilers).

So, Darcy, Bingley, and their cousin Richard Fitzwilliam (the cousin who appears at Rosings in P&P) make up Slurry and they are in desperate need of an opening act for their tour.  Lizzy, Jane, and Charlotte front a "girl-band" (hate that term) called Long Borne Suffering (haha) and, conveniently, Slurry is near-enough to see them play a gig.  Conveniently for the plot, LBS is booked for the tour and the major character quirks (Darcy is standoffish, Jane and Bingley have instant attraction, Lizzy enjoys needling Darcy) easily translate from the book.  Tour and marriage plots ensue.

What I enjoyed most were some really good plot changes.  Charlotte and Richard are fleshed out, Mr. Collins is actually called-out for taking advantage of a situation, Lydia's subplot is downgraded since she only appears in a handful of scenes, and Caroline Bingley is a much nicer person.  I think the stressors of a new band jumping into the deep end with a major tour were shown adequately and Rigaud didn't shy away from the anonymous sex-and-drugs pull of the music world.   

And then there were some plot decisions that really made no sense. Wickham's prediliction for "ladies with learner's permits" (a la Georgiana's story, which is retained for the book) turns into a drug problem out of nowhere (and gets an FBI plot thrown in for good measure).  The Bennets' marriage issues are only alluded to (the Bennet parents and younger siblings hardly figure in the story) and could have done away with entirely and saved about 20 pages in total.  Richard gets a sex addiction plot (hey, Lizzy/Darcy and Jane/Bingley have built-in conflict courtesy of P&P, he and Charlotte have to fight about something).  Original names are retained (Fitzwilliam? Really? Lady Catherine is still, inexplicably, referred to as Lady Catherine yet she's not referred to as English in any way).  And the triple marriage plot is really unbelievable in a modern sense.

And then there are the sex scenes.  What's that you say?  Yes, there is a LOT of well-described sex in this book.  Far, far more than what I was expecting and enough to make me wonder why this book is merchandized in Fiction as opposed to Romance.  Adventurous boots-knocking occurs with regularity - Jane and Bingley, Charlotte and random person, Richard and random person(s), Richard and Charlotte, Darcy and Lizzy (and then they fight, then have more sex) - and also so discussion of previous sexual experiences (novel gains points for allowing heroines to have sexual experiences prior to the acquaintance of the heros).  The writing-style of the scenes changed, too, to a style more generic to the bodice-ripper genre.  I wouldn't have minded as much except there was a multitude of man-will-teach-woman-how-sexytimes-are-properly-done schtick...totally out of place in a contemporary novel (loses points previously gained).  The power of the Magic HooHoo and the Mighty Wang of Lovin' made obvious appearances (I've started following the Smart Bitches on twitter).

If you like a more adventurous contemporary romance novel, this is definitely for you.

On Chesil Beach

This is probably one of the shortest reviews I've ever done for a book I finished.

My friend Kat had an old ARC of On Chesil Beach she had read and didn't want any more.  I had read middling reviews but liked Ian McEwan's style so I said I'd take it.  This is a short book.  Not much happens.  An early 1960s pair of British newlyweds have some serious teenage-level misunderstandings on their wedding night.  They say some nasty things to one another after attempting (unsuccessfully) to have sex.  They Have An Argument (capitals intended).  Leading up to the Argument, we get flashbacks as each thinks back over growing up, meeting each other, and courting. 

The writing is nice and I like McEwan's way of putting words together (I loved Atonement, kept me up on Christmas night to finish).  But, I don't get the story in On Chesil Beach (maybe I don't get the characters).  Is there a story?

Vixen

Vixen seemed like another run-of-the-mill, bland teen romance novel of the racier variety, with a 1920s Chicago society flapper setting overlaid, when I hit a glaring anachronism.

I'm not talking about why a Harvard graduate bothers with high school girls.

I'm talking about Lady Chatterley's Lover - a book not published until 1928 from a firm in Italy, then Knopf in a censored edition in the US in 1928. In one scene, Lorraine mentions her father's first edition of LCL but Vixen is set in 1922 (evidence: Gloria mentions the Volstead Act was passed in 1919 when she was 14, she is now 17 in the novel making the setting 1922). How does a book become valuable enough to collect 6 years before publication? Very, very glaring.

I have an advanced edition, so if this shows up in the final edition....in a book that already already strikes me as "unimpressive" it's an elementary mistake.  Consider, also, that this is a teen novel and it feels like an insult, like it's expected that a teen would recognize the title and overlook the anachronism through ignorance.

Definitely not a book I would recommend; too many "main" characters, too many secrets, too many backstories, not enough "meat".  Read F. Scott Fitzgerald instead.

Dear FTC: I received a copy of this novel as part of an advanced reading group.

Frogs, frogs, frogs

Bollocks again.

I can't count - I thought 6 sets of 10 + 6 more stitches = 76.

Wrong. I get the fail whale for this poncho.

Unfortunately, I only realised this after I got the 3.5 inches of collar knitted up in rib, chased the cats out of the knitting bag three times, and tried to add the three new stitch markers that I found out I was 10 stitches short. No wonder it wouldn't really fit over my niece's head (she's three, so I figured if it fit her head it would fit a younger child).

I've now ripped the entire thing out, much to the amusements of the cats because I've done exactly what I yelled at them for (ripping out stitches), and I'm pretty sure I've got 76 stitches casted on now. I counted twice, saw there were only 66 (again) and added 10 more.

I think this poncho hates me.

I really hate our movie theatres

So The Reader is opening in wider release this weekend. I really, really want to see this because I read the book (loved it) and Kate Winslet is rumored to give one of the best performances of the year as Hanna.

Is this playing near me? No. I would have to drive to Davenport, to a theatre-for-which-I've-never-been-to-that-part-of-the-city, and it is still winter in Iowa, with terrible weather, so a Davenport trip by myself is completely out of the question. I actually went to the moviefone website and I can't get any date within a 25-mile radius of Iowa City any time in January to come up for The Reader. Gah!!!!!!

So what should I do tonight? I could go to the grocery store, see a different movie, go home and watch a DVD, or go home and read a book (yes, I have a very boring life). Going to the grocery store is out because I did that one other time on a Friday night and couldn't find anything I wanted to buy because the shelves weren't stocked (and it was busy, go figure). I'm not sure the crap-tabulous Marcus Theatres-owned Coral Ridge 10 has anything I want to watch (I've heard Frost/Nixon is good, but I'm not interested; maybe they have Revolutionary Road?). I do have DVDs from Netflix - Oklahoma! (National Theatre production with Hugh Jackman, mmmmmm), The Duchess (with Keira Knightley and Ralph Fiennes, at least I could have my Ralph Fiennes fix), and The Bourne Ultimatum (not really in the mood for that but I should get it watched and in the mail). I also have tons of books to read, including The Homecoming (also by Bernhard Schmidt, author of The Reader). I'm sure I can find something to do.

I forgot - I could go to the gym, too, but I should be nice to my shoulder since I wrenched it trying not to fall down in the store parking lot. You should see the bruise on my shoulder blade from the latissimus strain.

Writer's Block Friday

After yesterday's excitement today seems very blah. My office isn't being drooled upon (leaky water tank on roof caused serious wet carpet and ceiling tile issues) and UNESCO isn't handing out any accolades today.

I am once again inputting (verb?) data for our study. I'm way behind, so I need to work fast, but ... it's ... so ... mind-numbing. I can hear my brain cells die of boredom. The only reason I have to do it is because you have to be trained to recognize catheter-related blood-stream infections (CR-BSIs - crabbies, for lack of a better term). I'm the only one of the research team, besides the boss, who can do this.

I also need to start working with the burn unit on some observations of practice (in the tub room of all places) and MRSA cultures of various sources. I get to observe in the tub room because I'm the only one who won't faint or toss cookies. For anyone who doesn't know, the tub room is where the burn patients get scrubbed down, debrieded, and re-bandaged; there's lots of screaming and it smells really bad. I would be started on this already but the unit manager hasn't emailed me back, yet.

I've started back into the Newbery Project. After The Story of Mankind and The Voyage of Dr. Doolittle I decided I couldn't take all the Euro-American-centric viewpoints all together in order. It was a bit much. I'm going to come at it from a different angle. I've been wanting to re-read The Westing Game for a long time so I'll re-start with that one; plus, the movie adaptation for The Tale of Desperaux is coming out so I picked that up, too. I'll get there, by hook or by crook!

Public Transportation Etiquette

For all those people who somehow managed to escape kindergarten without learning basic rules of public behavior, let me give you a little lesson about how to behave on the public transportation system (which in my case means the bus, but this is applicable to subways and commuter trains as well).

1. Have your fare ready. If you don't have your fare or pass out, please step aside to let others board while you dig in your pockets.
2. Please seat yourself quickly. Don't stand in the middle of the aisle when there are seats in the back. The aisle is narrow and we can't get past you.
3. Once you are seated please don't take up more than one seat (unless you don't fit into just one). Lounging and putting your feet on the seats makes less room for other passengers.
4. Please keep your conversation to yourself. This includes both cell phone and in-person conversations. If your companion is sitting next to you then you shouldn't need to yell at one another; if you are not sitting close, please don't shout up and down the carriage. If you're yelling into your cell phone continue the conversation at another time.
5. Bring your headphones for your personal audio device. Do you really want everyone else to know that you have terrible taste?
6. If you are with small children, please discipline them. We none of us like to have your child kick us repeatedly throughout the ride.
7. If you are under the age of 18, and riding alone, keep your mouth shut and your hands to yourself.
8. Please practice good personal hygiene. No one likes to ride next to someone who smells like decaying roadkill and who might also be harboring lice and fleas. Don't pick your nose, either.
9. Please exit off the back of the bus. The only time you would need to exit through the front is if the bus is packed or if you have a mobility issue (i.e. wheelchair) and need to use the lift. Being lazy is not a mobility issue.

Now that the lesson for the day is over, I would like to say that my new internal antenna N-network router is amazing. I have been able to use my laptop while in other parts of my apartment without losing the wireless connection. Just a note for others who have feline housemates - don't get a router with an external antenna; I had to replace mine because there were chew marks all over it and I'm assuming that's why I had trouble getting a decent signal.

I managed to reverse the idea that pulling me off surveillance was a good idea. I convinced my boss that surveillance was more important because it was so far behind, like six months behind. So they're going to hire a biostats person for the analysis and I'm full-steam ahead on the surveillance (I have another 4 days done). And then the boss departed for Europe, not return until December. Except now I have to take care of an IRB application that mysteriously came due this week after she left.

Current book-in-progress: The Castle of Otranto, The Post-American World, and The Shock Doctrine
Current knitted item: yellow secret item is almost done
Current movie obsession: Clerks but I'm not finding it as funny as the first time
Current iTunes loop: Filmspotting (there are a lot of episodes to go through)

Why is it always me?

So I'm not completely sold out - the boss forgot to talk to me about pausing surveillance to do the analysis, which is for a clinical department dataset so at least that keeps the money going in the same direction. If I had as many meetings as she does I might lose my mind, too, some days.

The bean counters get very itchy about mixing clinical money/projects and research money/projects.

The reason why I would be temporarily pulled is because I have the best skill set to do the job - meaning I'm the only one around that can program, run, and analyze data using the statistical package and is currently on the clinical department payroll, even for only four hours a week.

Which leads me to wonder why it's always me? Why am I the only one who can get the job done when required even though there are however many other people who work in this division and technically have the same degree that I do? You start to feel like the department bicycle after a while.

I can't listen to that...

I just listened to five minutes of the Guardian UK's Digested Reads podcast which consisted of a reading from The Shack, which is a religious novel that is selling incredibly well based on word-of-mouth publicity.

All I can say is that I couldn't listen to the rest of the reading. Awful, awful writing. I would rather just read the Bible straight.

Methinks I'm losing my mind

People are crazy. Therefore they drive me nuts.

And they do stupid things. Therefore they piss me off.

I need to visit one of my subordinate chapters because there is some bad ju-ju that can only be fixed by a series of face to face meetings. Email and IM only do so much.

I am really starting to miss regular television. Too much reality TV. So thank you to the studios for finally putting together a reasonable contract for the writers. On the other hand, I've been making great use of my Netflix account.

I've been diagnosed with chronic tendinitis in one ankle. This means it hurts all the time especially when I would like to exercise or take ballet class. Problematic also in that I really, really need to not gain any more weight and make some progress on getting back in shape.

I have the mid-February blahs. Must be Valentine's day soon.

I've finished a number of books. I've also started more than I've finished. Sounds about right.

Current book-in-progress: I'm about halfway through Bloom's The Western Canon; also on the burner is Cancer Ward, The Millenium Problems (because for some reason I've become obsessed with math theory - I'm sure it will pass), The Shakespeare Wars, Candy Girl, The Historical Austen, and Searching for Jane Austen (because Northanger Abbey is the February BNBC book for "Literature by Women") and there are probably more but I forget
Current knitted item: blue socks (i'm not feeling up to another Eeyore even though I really need to get them finished)
Current movie obsession: Northanger Abbey (2007 ITV adaptation); I'm also working on seeing as many Oscar nominated films as possible before the show this month (not going terribly well)